I Remember When... In Honor Of My Dad!

I remember when I was a little girl , I would wait for you to come home from work and jump into your arms. You would let me climb your legs and you held onto my arms and I would flip myself upside down like an acrobat.

I remember the days we had together camping. Just you and me! Things were simple, and you made them so.

I remember when you helped Mom decorate the house for the Holidays and the Christmas Joy and Laughter throughout the house.

I remember the dinners you enjoyed when Mom was well enough to cook them. The smile on your face, is one that no one could ever forget.

I remember all the hard work you did to support us. The tales of Military Life in the Army and your travels afar. I felt proud of your accomplishments. I am still proud of you!

I remember when you took care of Mom when she had cancer and I saw how much this took a toll on your well being,  I did not understand what was really happening, but you showed me how to be strong, those were your words. "You need to be strong".

I remember all the trips to the hospital, when Mom was sick and eating breakfast with you in the cafeteria; this was the first time I tried scrambled eggs with salt. I loved them! Again, you kept it simple!

I remember our shopping trips to the grocery store. I loved shopping with you, It was my favorite thing to do. The shopping cart would always be full to the top and you made sure that we would never go without food.

I remember our first attempt at fishing. You showed me how to use a fishing pole and we caught a sun fish. This was one of my favorite days.

I remember when you helped me with my homework and you told me to always do your best. "Do The Best That You Can Do". You never pushed me to do anything, these were your gentle ways.

I remember your voice early in the morning , waking me to get ready for school. I am grateful , you were always there to get me up, then off to work you went.

I remember the hard times, when you tried your best to help Mom, things were complicating once she became dependent on pain medicine. The anger, sadness, and frustration started to take place in our home, but you still held on tight.

I remember the summer when you painted our big old house with a single paintbrush. I was amazed!

I remember when you drove me to places I wanted to go. Even if it was a rock concert or punk rock show, you would sit and wait for me in the parking lot, while I watched the bands play. You were always there.

I remember the day I found out you had diabetes and never really knew how serious this disease was until I was in college and studied pathophysiology. This is when I became worried.

I remember your face when you saw my tattoo on my forearm. This did not make you happy. Sorry Dad, oh yeah you were right, I am stuck with it for life now. 

I remember taking you to the doctors and filling your meds. Things were tough, I got angry about having two sick parents to care for.  I was worried, but you told me "Do not worry so much".

I remember the day you had your first heart attack. You drove yourself to the hospital and told me not to worry. I did not know diabetes could cause so many complications. You ended up with a bad leg and vascular problems. You still kept on going.. work and all and still caring for Mom.

I remember the good days and the bad days. You tried to quit smoking, but the stress was too much and this was your outlet. I understood! It broke my heart to watch you light up those cigs. I still loved you.

I remember the day you walked me down the trail at Beavertail Park. It was my Wedding Day, you were proud. I still can see your smile.

I remember the day I told you , I wanted to be a Massage Therapist, and you said, "If that is what you want to do, then go ahead". You were always there to support my decisions. 

I remember taking your blood sugars,and taking mine too at the same time, because I had gestational diabetes. I taught you what I learned about my own self care.

I remember the day you were able to hold your granddaughter. You were able to enjoy her for about six months. She knows a lot about you. And she says , that she misses you and wishes you were still here. 

I remember the day you had your open heart surgery at Beth Deaconess Israel hospital. This was the hardest time of my life. I knew I was losing you. I watched you go through so much and this was torture. My heart was breaking, but I had to stay strong, I was a mother now, caring for an infant and still needed to care for Mom.

I remember when they sent you to a rehabilitation nursing facility. I went to visit you there and brought your granddaughter to cheer you up. You tried to look your best, but I could tell how depressed you were. I wished there was something I could do to make everything go back to the way things were when I was young. I accepted what was happening to you and prayed for God to give me strength.

I remember the day you came home from the nursing home. You wanted to stop for a hot dog and a soda. This was not part of the diet you were supposed to follow, but it made you happy, so I gave in!

I remember trying so hard to keep you healthy. I did not want you to smoke anymore, or eat anymore cupcakes. But I knew you were going to do it anyway.  It made you happy!

I remember the day before your last day here on earth. We had a yard sale, you were cold that day and wore a jacket in 90 degree weather. I was so caught up in rushing around the yard sale to get back home to my six month old daughter. As I left that day,  I noticed you were smoking on the deck, trying to hide and sneak , like a kid. I accepted it , although it broke my heart. You called me when I left that day, to come back. You needed some bread. I did not know that this would be our last phone call with each other.

I remember the call I got into the beginning of my shift at work. Mom said you were not waking up and she thought you passed away. I dropped what I was doing, left work and dialed 911 as I raced home. This was the worst feeling in the world, I could not believe this was the day. If I only had more time to spend with him, I thought.

I remember the recliner you slept in. We still have it! It still smells like you. It is the same chair I found you in when you passed on into another life. You were now in God's kingdom, I believe, eating a twinkie and a hostess cupcake, looking down on us, saying.. keep up the good work. I am happy that you are not suffering anymore. I will always love you and you are still my inspiration for all that I do. Thank you for being strong and for always loving our family. I will always be the best that I can be.

In honor of my father, I decided to write this article as a tribute to him.  Tuesday, July 16th, 2013, will make seven years since our loss. As I reflect upon his life and the difficulties with his health, I have made a pledge to myself to be the healthiest me I can be. His Diabetes Mellitus caused peripheral vascular disease, renal insufficiency, and myocardial infarction along with COPD and Congestive Heart Failure. It breaks my heart to know that all this could have been prevented with a little health and wellness in his mind and body. I believe that everything happens for a reason and I know that my passion for health and wellness lies within the experiences I have had with my father and mother.

My own journey towards better health has recently led me to the discovery of organic living and healthy lifestyle products.

If I only had this knowledge to give to my father 10- 15 years ago, I truly believe he would still be here with us now. You see, Your body has its own repair mechanism, the physiological ability to regenerate your own damaged cells, and restore the body to homeostasis -- the natural state of balance.

So it is in honor of my father that I share this with you all.  Who do you know who needs help with their health today? Send them to my website , you never know how powerful the body really is. When you start giving it what it needs to regenerate and repair, the body will do amazing things.

 Thanks for reading this. It means a lot to me, and I hope that you will share this with folks you know who may be someone you love, or someone who suffers from chronic fatigue, diabetes, stress or anxiety, fibromyalgia, muscle or joint pain, sleep problems, difficulty focusing,
decreased sex-drive, immune or neurological concerns, including Parkinson's & Alzheimer's Diseases.

  Or an athlete or performer. Or someone who is just concerned about preventing
the premature signs of aging, like me.

I encourage you to get in touch with me so we can talk about some of the things that have worked for me and some of the things that have worked for others that I know. Wishing you success!

Your Wellness Advocate,

 Deana Hodell, LMT

 +1.401.523.4275